I need a hug

I need a hug.

This may seem like no big deal to anyone else but it is to me. For years I have been "no touchy." I didn't really enjoy hugs, cuddles, or any touching of any kind. I cringed when people forgot this very large detail about me and went in for the side, frontal, or any other wierd position. I've dealt with this phobia for a while now and I've come to a couple conclusions.

First, I realize that I created my "no touchy" to protect myself from pain. However, I'm coming out of the phase. I realize that I enjoy hugging people and being close to them. Now, don't get carried away. I will still beat you for touching my hair or making me feel smothered. The penalty is death for these. I think that time is the most healing piece of the puzzle. God has done a huge healing process on me and its taken a long time. He's comforted my soul and held me in his arms as I've fallen. I have slowly emereged a different person, than before. I realize this through my hugs. They are much more freely given because my wounds are no longer open sores but merely scars. Scars are sometimes tender. Tender is much better than flowing with blood and pain.

So though the healing process I am becoming proud of my scars. Scars are interesting and they always have a story behind them. I like that. As I appreciate my community that surrounds me I can hug them with no fear of bleeding out because my God has done the bleeding for me.

For those of you huggy people who refuse to respect my bubble--thank you. You have helped being Jesus in the flesh.